Choosing A Legal Guardian For Minor Children

Parenthood is a journey of unconditional love, but it also comes with significant responsibilities. As parents, ensuring the well-being and security of our children is paramount, even in unforeseen circumstances. Selecting a guardian is one of the most critical decisions parents of minor children must make as part of their estate planning process.

Understanding the Role of a Guardian: A guardian is someone who will step in to care for your children if both parents are unable to do so. This could occur due to death, incapacity, or other unforeseen circumstances. The guardian is responsible for providing a loving and supportive environment for your children and making decisions regarding their upbringing, education, healthcare, and general welfare.

Key Considerations When Choosing a Guardian:

1. Shared Values and Parenting Philosophy

   Look for someone who shares your values, beliefs, and parenting philosophy. Consider factors such as discipline, education, religion, and lifestyle to ensure that the guardian will provide a consistent and nurturing environment for your children.

2. Emotional Connection and Relationship

   Choose someone with whom your children have a strong emotional bond and a positive relationship. This could be a family member, close friend, or mentor who knows your children well and has demonstrated love, care, and support for them.

3. Stability and Reliability

   Seek a guardian who demonstrates stability, reliability, and maturity. Consider factors such as financial stability, employment status, stability of their family situation, and ability to provide a stable and nurturing home environment for your children.

4. Willingness and Ability to Serve

   Discuss the role of guardian with potential candidates to ensure that they are willing and able to take on this responsibility. Consider their availability, willingness to relocate if necessary, and ability to provide for the physical, emotional, and financial needs of your children.

5. Communication and Shared Expectations

   Open and honest communication is essential when discussing the role of guardian. Clearly communicate your expectations, values, and wishes regarding your children's upbringing, education, and other important matters to ensure alignment and mutual understanding.

Taking Action: Choosing a guardian is a deeply personal decision that requires careful consideration and reflection. Take the time to discuss your options with your partner, family members, and potential guardians. Consider seeking guidance from a trusted advisor, such as an estate planning attorney or family counselor, to help you navigate this process and ensure that your decision reflects your children's best interests.

Selecting a guardian for your children is one of the most significant decisions you'll make as a parent. By considering factors such as shared values, emotional connection, stability, willingness to serve, and communication, you can choose a guardian who will provide a loving and supportive environment for your children, even in your absence. Remember that estate planning is a dynamic process, and it's essential to review and update your choices regularly as your family's circumstances evolve. With thoughtful consideration and proactive planning, you can provide peace of mind for yourself and your loved ones, knowing that your children will be well cared for, no matter what the future holds. Stay tuned for more insights into optimizing your estate plan for the needs of your growing family.

What to Consider When Nominating a Guardian

As we told you in our previous post on guardianship,  your elected guardian is a recommendation to a judge stating who you want to care for your child when/if you are unable to do so. 

Sometimes we meet with clients who do not have anyone who lives nearby, or they do not feel they have anyone in their network who is qualified (emotionally, financially, physically) to care for their child/children. If you fall into one of those categories, who else should you think about? 

We suggest that you think about your relatives, friends, and colleagues who share your values. We have found that this is the most important part of selecting a guardian. 

Values can include: 

• Judgment and discretion that generally aligns with your parenting

• Religion/Culture 

• Education 

• Activities that you want your child to participate in/not participate in (e.g. sports, music) 

• Comfort/ability to visit relatives and/or accept visiting relatives 

• Ability or desire to travel for vacation

You can nominate a guardian for your minor child, and your nomination holds a lot of weight. Ultimately, though, a judge needs to sign off on the nomination. And that judge will be concerned with one thing: the best interest of the child who needs a guardian. 

Judges don’t want to uproot a child who is otherwise thriving. Or send a child into a circumstance that will make the child more unstable than maintaining the status quo. However, judges are also typically reticent to send children overseas, especially if the child is a US citizen. By sending someone overseas, the court may lose jurisdiction (i.e. say over the matter). 

Having a judge oversee guardianship provides a level of protection and care for your child. If you nominated someone whose circumstances have changed drastically, you have peace of mind that your child will be placed in the best place for him or her. 

It can feel overwhelming to try to come up with a list of people who you would trust to care for your child. We can help talk this through with you so you can make the best decision for you and your family.

What is... Guardianship?

This is part of an on-going series of blog posts titled the "What Is..." series, where we attempt to explain, in simple terms, common estate planning terms and concepts. To read other posts in this series, click here.

Guardianship is a court proceeding where a court grants legal authority to someone other than a parent to care for a minor child. It’s legally appointing new parents for a minor child. This can mean taking care of the child day-to-day or it can mean taking care of the child’s finances; or, it can mean both. This typically needs to happen for orphaned children, but it sometimes happens when circumstances arise when parents are deemed unsuitable to care for their children.

Guardianship nominations are typically made in your will. When we talk about guardianship with our clients, we have a discussion surrounding who will take care of their children when they pass away or are permanently incapacited. Guardians can be family members, relatives, or even someone unrelated. They must be an adult, and must meet the court’s satisfaction to be suitable as a legal guardian, as determined by what is in the best interest of the child.

Some common issues to address when nominating guardians for minor children are the following: Is your preferred guardian a married couple? Do you want to nominate both spouses in the couple? What if they divorce, is there a preferred guardian? Are you nominating a guardian that would require your child to be uprooted from her/his life? Are you nominating someone who has the resources—both financial and time—to dedicate to your child?

Biological parents have first dibs on guardianship. And a court is most likely to grant guardianship to the biological parent, unless there is a reason not to do so. 

• In the case of a blended family, this would mean that the children of dad and ex-wife would go to ex-wife before they go to stepmom. 

• In the case of parents who are unmarried (and never were married), the child would go to the living parent, regardless of marital status. 

Guardianship is why any parent needs a will (in addition to a trust). It’s an important decision, and you need to document your choice so that it can speak when you are unable to. Do not leave it up to chance.

Everyone Needs an Estate Plan (Examples 2 & 3)

Estate planning is much more than just death planning and giving away your stuff after you die. It’s also about planning for circumstances that you may not have anticipated. 

This post is the second installment in our "Everyone Needs and Estate Plan" series. If you missed Example 1, click here to read it.

Example 2: You are married, and you have a couple of children. Now imagine that you and your spouse divorce. Neither of you have done any estate planning. If you or your now ex-spouse remarry and die before his or her new spouse, you could have unintentionally just cut your kids out of his or her inheritance. Without proper planning, by default, your estate goes to your surviving spouse, the person you were married to when you died. In this example, the surviving spouse happened to be someone who is not the parent of your children. At least some of the assets you may have intended on going to your children are now in the hands of someone unrelated to your children.

Example 3: Same facts as Example 2, except neither of you remarry, and instead you both tragically die. Your children are still minors (under the age of 18) and lack the legal authority to make legally-binding decisions on their own (enrolling them in school, going on field trips, renting an apartment, making financial transactions, etc.). Because you did zero estate planning, we now have two orphans who need legal guardians. Well, you never got around to telling the world who that should be in a legal document. So whoever thinks they should be your children’s parents goes off to court, and hopefully the court makes a good decision. That's probably not the way you want it to play out.

Check back next week for another example of why everyone needs an estate plan. If you would like a free one-hour consultation to discuss your estate planning goals, do not hesitate to contact us.